1. What kind of Europe are you after?
A. Small towns with wine
B. Coastal towns and islands
C. The showstopper cities
D. Whichever one has the best pastry
Why I ask: rivers run through the middle of Europe, past villages, vineyards and castles. That's the magic. You'll get some big cities, like Vienna, Budapest and Paris, but you'll get them in a day, not three. If Rome, Florence and Barcelona are the dream, a river can't get you there. And if it's islands and sea views you want, you want a ship on the coast, not a river.
2. How much bathing suit time do you need?
A. Not much. A dip in the ship's pool after a hot day is plenty
B. I want to swim in the sea daily
C. Either full beach days or none at all, on my schedule
D. Pack it, and tell me when to wear it
Why I ask: nobody books a river cruise for beach weather. Some ships have a small pool, and that's about it. If your ideal day ends in the Mediterranean, that's a coastal trip. Be honest about this one. It's the answer people fudge and then regret.
3. How do you feel about crowds?
A. They don't bother me. I'm with my group and a good guide
B. I'd rather hit smaller ports, but I'll share a few famous spots
C. I want no crowds. I'll go early, go off-season, go where the tour buses don't
D. As long as someone else figures out how to avoid them
Why I ask: a river cruise docks where the river goes, on the ship's schedule, often alongside other ships. In the famous towns, you'll be on a guided walk with a lot of other people doing the same thing. A good guide makes that easy. But if your whole idea of a great day is beating everyone to the square at 7 a.m., you'll feel boxed in.
4. How do you feel about moving your luggage?
A. Unpack once and let the ship do the moving
B. Unpack once, but wake up somewhere new on the coast
C. I can roll a bag on and off a train. Moving is part of the trip
D. I'm not carrying anything
Why I ask: this is the river cruise's best selling point, and it's real. You unpack once and wake up in a new town most mornings. For a lot of people, that alone is worth it. But if you don't mind a train and you'd rather pick your own towns and stay as long as you like, you're paying for convenience you don't need.
5. The river runs low and you spend a day on a motor coach instead. You…
A. Roll with it. I'm still in Europe
B. That's why I'd rather be on the sea
C. That's why I don't cruise
D. You'll handle it, right?
Why I ask: because it happens. In 2026 the water dropped on the Danube and Rhine, and some sailings swapped ships or spent days on coaches. It doesn't happen every year, and some rivers barely deal with it at all (here's which ones). But if a changed plan would ruin the trip for you, I'd rather we know that now.
Where you should go, based on your answers
Mostly A's: take the river cruise. You want small towns, you don't need the beach, and you'd love to unpack once. That's exactly what a river does best. Next step: pick the river and the line.
Mostly B's: go small ship, but on the coast. You want the unpack-once ease, but with sea views and swim stops. A small-ship coastal cruise in the Mediterranean or the Adriatic gives you that. It's not a river cruise, and that's fine.
Mostly C's: skip the cruise. You want freedom: your towns, your pace, your schedule. Trains, a driver, or a self-guided trip will make you a lot happier than a ship's itinerary.
Mostly D's: call me. You want a mix, and you don't want to worry about the decisions. That's literally my job.
Mostly A's? Here's your next step
Once you know a river cruise fits, the real decision is which line. They look nearly identical in the brochures, and they're not: who welcomes kids, who charges solo travelers extra, what's actually included, and who each line is really built for. I put 10 of them side by side.